For those joining in the Faith Barista Jam today: At the end of the post, click the blue button to submit the url of your blog post on the topic of "Discovering God's Purpose For You". If you don't have a post to share, no worries. Just comment!
I think I’m pregnant with promise, but what if I’m wrong?
It’s a question that plagues me like water dripping out of a broken faucet.
I’ve tried to turn off the doubt with positive sayings and even memorized verses.
But, my fears of failing won’t go away.
It’s because God hasn’t given up on me. He wants me to keep moving towards my God-sized dreams.
It’s not the first time God has given me a dream bigger than what I’m capable of. Most of my life has been spent pursuing what I’ve believed God has called me to do. But I look back and see long stretches of fall and winter. I can’t say those years weren’t fruitful, because I have come to develop a comfort in finding God in them.
I’ve depended on God since my early years as the oldest girl growing up in a single parent family with little means. God is all the Daddy I know, so I stuck to him for dear life.
Dysfunctional upbringing? I sucked up the words of Jesus, like the last oxygen mask left in a broken plane crashing down. Dreams of becoming a writer dashed for a practical engineering degree? I chose to find my joy in serving others instead. A traumatic stint in missions left years marked by solitude and prayer, while singleness past 30 handed me the questions about the gift of singleness.
Even though I later got the surprising joy of getting married, I’ve been learning to be content with the storyline of my life for a very long time.
I got so good at living with the disappointment of yesterday, that I have trouble opening my heart up to taste joy in today…
…To read the rest of my story – Click here and jump to Holley Gerth’s blog — Heart to Heart — where today’s post is published.
It’s a Double-Feature!
My post today for our Faith Barista Jam on the topic “Discovering God’s Purpose For Me” coincides with my guest post at Holley Gerth’s blog, as part of her ongoing series on “God-Sized Dreams”.
Earlier this year, I met with Holley, co-founder of Dayspring’s (In)Courage website and author of Rain On Me, when she was in California attending the Mt. Herman Writer’s Conference.
Since Holley’s out in Arkansas, it was a rare opportunity to catch her live, and she is the real deal! We got a chance to share our faith journeys — and I left with with a fuller heart, touched by the transparency and encouragement of a friend in Holley.
Tree Of Life Bracelet Giveaway!
Be sure to comment over at Holley’s Blog to win this bracelet!
I hope a Faith Barista reader wins!
Remember to submit your post for the Faith Barista Jam below, if you have one… then, keep me company by dropping a comment over at Holley’s blog!
(I’ve turned off the comments here, so we can go jam over at there! See you on the “other side”!)
*** NOW, IT’S YOUR TURN — FAITH BARISTA JAM! ***
Faith Barista Jam Thursdays — I serve up a topic of faith, you write the post. Keep faith fresh with a faith prompt and add your voice to this community.
Today’s topic: Discovering God’s Purpose For Me
Submit your post on today’s topic by clicking on the blue button below “Add Your Link”. If you don’t have a blog, share by posting a comment on my guest post today at Holley’s blog.
Next week’s 10/7 Topic: How Does Your Faith Affect Your Personality?
Approach it any way you feel inspired! Only required ingredient: keep it real. Thanks for serving your personal brews!
Build the Keep Fresh Fresh Community: Link back to Faith Barista or grab the Faith Barista Jam Badge to place in your post. Click here.
It’s a jam session. As time allows, say hi & drop a comment when visiting the community faith blends!
Photo courtesy of Photobucket.
[…] Thursday’s post is part of the Thursday Faith Jam over at Bonnie Gray’s Faith Barista […]
This is the first time I’ve been to your site. It’s very refreshing and inspiring — also very real. I’ve written no post to coincide with your theme, though I still may do so, if time allows.
I’ve been spending a great deal of my time these last few weeks with my mother who was diagnosed with breast cancer. SO MANY THINGS have come about, mostly good (can you beat that?) because of her health issue. She and I had grown apart and now we’ve created a new relationship based on honesty and God — yes, “GOD”. We had never been a family to discuss God much. We were raised in a home where we went to a parochial school, attended church each week, and that’s where it stopped.
Now at 52 I’m learning that God is so much more than a weekly trip to church. He’s guiding me, and many things in me have changed. I feel God’s hand turning me this way or that way, leading with love and strength.
I’m rambling. Well — I started a prayer request link on my blog and I’ve been praying for others in need. I think this was the first thing I was guided to do. I’ve received quite a few requests and I pray that I am doing it right, but I have faith that I understood God’s voice in starting the prayer link.
Anyway, I’ve got a couple of other things that I think are being inspired by God. I pray that I hear Him correctly and that I carry out his commands.
I’ve signed up to be a reader of your blog, and I will also join your blog frog group. So I guess this was a short introduction, and I look forward to getting to know you better!
We are never to young or too old to be pregnant with God. I am 72 years old and I am scared and excited about what He is doing. The only thing that keeps me sane is I know I can trust the Maker of these dreams. At 70 He put on my heart to do a web site for Mothers with Prodigals. motherspraying.com This for someone who is still looking for the “any button”.
This also created my Heart to Heart letter, which I could share with several girls at work.
Now at 72 I am hitching my life to the Almighty’s wonderful dreams again. At midnight I am scared, in the bright morning sun I am excited. Sound familiar. Recently I went on a LOA from my job in Arizona to help with my son in San Diego who had a heart attack and already had a disabilty but handles that well thanks to the Lord. While I was there He started tugging at my heart that I needed to get out of secular work and get into His work in San Diego. The Church I was going to during that time, the Pastor was preaching in Mark and how important it was to immediately respond to Him. I wanted to, I even searched for a place to live. Everything was way out of my price range and I would be quiting my job . . .scary, so scary I decided there was nothing I could do about this and if this is what my Abba Father wanted for me He would show me how to do this. The very next Sunday the pastor said if anyone had the Lord tugging on their heart to do something and needed prayer, please come up and they would pray with them. You never seen a pregnant 72 year old move so fast. They prayed, I cried but still did not see how this could be done. Went back to where I had been sitting and this lady said you wouldn’t know anyone who is looking for a one bedroom guest house. Of course, He provides when He guides. Great place, can even see the bay from the balcony, one of my favorite places in the world. Well I have not delivered yet but am preparing for this God Size Dream. My house is up for sale. I am sorting out just what I need for San Diego, not what I want, and retired from my job. In one month I will be standing in front of my “Employer” asking where He wants me.
What an awesome God we serve!
[…] post is part of Bonnie’s Jam at Faith Barista popover to her site for a warm welcome and amazing writing that can not help but move […]
[…] This post was mentioned on Twitter by FaithBarista and FaithBarista, Jay Cookingham. Jay Cookingham said: Why God-Sized Dreams Embrace Awkwardness & Joy http://bit.ly/bNUlu5 /cc @feedly […]
God is taking me to new places in Him. Joy is like the wind that carries me through the times of trial. Joy enables me to keep God’s perspective in my thinking. DKW
Wow…..can I relate!! God has been doing a work in my life for a long time….however I have not always realized it was Him, I’m pregnant with those same dreams as I write this….it’s scary to step out and wait to see His hand put the pieces together in front of you, it seems I have a little voice whispering….”what if this is your idea and not God’s idea???” but He has confirmed over and over again that He is guiding me to other women to love, encourage, and mentor, and most importantly during the time spent together….point them to the Lord! It’s possible I may have an opportunity to be a youth group leader for teen girls….I’m willing if this is God’s plan however that little voice is now much louder, screaming “I don’t know if you are equipped to do this!!” but to be honest it’s been a dream to mentor young women on a ongoing basis…..I will continue praying and waiting to see if I “give birth” to a new chapter in my life with my Lord leading the way and giving me what is necessary to accomplish His work.
Waiting with anticipation,
I too can relate to being good at remembering the disappointments of yesterday and not relishing in the joy of today. God gently reminded me that He knows what’s best for me and He really does have good plans for me( Jer.29:11) through your post.I pray that God showers you with His love and guidance as you pursue your God sized dream!
Great post! :o)
.-= Nikole Hahn´s last blog ..Mama Cried =-.
[…] So much has changed this year for me. I told my Going Off Script story for the first time to so many. The ripple effects of sharing it has forced me to let go of some things while freeing me to pursue others. […]
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