Is Father’s Day worth remembering when you don’t have a daddy?
Since my daddy left when I was five, I’ve never really had a hard time with Father’s Day.
I described it to my friends this way whenever they asked if it was sad growing up without one:
I don’t feel anything. It’s probably like being born without a limb. You can’t miss what you’ve never had.
Now that I’m not a kid any more, I don’t have to lie.
It was sad — because I can never know what it’s like to have a daddy.
A Little Too Strong
I don’t recall the exact question I asked my mom, but I remember her words like it was yesterday.
My mother told me to cope this way: “Just think of yourself as being born without a dad. Some fathers die when babies are born and they grow up just fine.”
I know she meant well. She didn’t want me to stumble. It did make me stronger–a little too strong, maybe. I never felt the pain of a missing father. I felt nothing.
I made a detour around the place inside me that wanted a father. I didn’t think I needed to be vulnerable, held, or carried. To feel this way was a sign of weakness and limitation.
This changed when I became an adult…
…To read the rest of the story – click here and jump over to Crosswalk.com, where today’s post is published.
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Photo courtesy of Keefers via Photobucket.
thanks for sharing!!
this IS a hard weekend for many, because of their relationships with their fathers, or not having an active dad in their life. my own relationship with my earthly father is strained, at best. i’m not ashamed to say that it’s taken a long time to come to a place of peace with that – and although i’d prefer us to have the closeness of a father/child relationship, it just won’t work here. so i love him from a safe distance, know that my prayers for our Father God to work in his heart and life, and that He will put other believers around him to share our Father God’s love with him.
i am grateful for the memories of a happy childhood with him in the pictures, but pray so hard that i’ll get a call sometime that he’s given his heart to Jesus, that he will choose to be a follower of God, that he’ll “get where we are coming from” instead of seeing our lifestyle of walking with Him as something bad and the church as his enemy.
i know that i’m not alone in this journey, many others walk this path too. i’m so grateful that my hubby had God’s example of a loving, heavenly Father to follow in being a dad to our 3 kids, and that we have the promise of eternal life to spend with Him….and what a Father’s Day THAT will be!!
love your heart…
Very cool to get a crosswalk article!
While I don’t personally relate to your distance from your father, I cna understand how you approach it.
If you don’t have a “dad”, then why wring your hands over it? And if your dad was a dud, then why spend the day wallowing. Rejoice in your HEavenly Father. Find some joy in the things that are working!
I don’t know why, but I thought of Canadian Boxing Day. I don’t know what the holiday is about and I’ve never celebrated it.