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Why It’s Not Selfish To Rest: Day 2 {quiet} 21 Days of Rest: Finding Spiritual Whitespace

By Bonnie Gray • June 2, 2014 • 12 Comments

Sometimes it feels wrong to think about yourself.

Isn’t it selfish to focus on what you want or need, when there is a long list of more important things?

Maybe we’re afraid if we took time out for quiet rest, soothing moments, we might realize how much we’ve put our hearts to the side.

It’s easier to be functional rather than soft and tender.

We wouldn’t want to let anyone down.

We wouldn’t want to stop.  In fear, we’d realize we really need to.  In fear, we’d really want to.

Quiet makes us vulnerable.

Quiet connects us to our heart.  The truth of how things really are.

The truth is this: who you are — your heart — is more important to God than any thing you can (or cannot) do for Him.

God loves you. Cherishes your heart. Deeply. Irrevocably. Competely.

Maybe that’s why rest is one of only three ambitions that God explicitly calls out in the Bible. The other two are preaching the gospel and pleasing God. (Rom15:20, 2Cor5:9)

“We urge you, brethren, to excel still more, and to make it your ambition to lead a quiet {restful} life.” 1Thess. 4:10–11

Turns out hesuchazo—the Greek word used for quiet and rest—is as important as preaching the gospel and pleasing God.

The more I’m able to enjoy rest, the more others will see God’s life in me. When my soul is at rest, I am free to please God right where I am.

I had always centered my thinking on pleasing God and preaching the gospel through what I did.

But now, hesuchazo frees me to live the gospel by nurturing who I am with quiet rest.

When you choose a quiet moment over producing or performing, you step into a beautiful space of receiving all you want to give to those you love — beauty, joy, intimacy, laughter, presence.

Feeding your soul isn’t selfish.

This is how stories of those we love change.

When we begin living a better story of rest. With God.

 ~~~~~

How do like to enjoy a quiet moment?  

What encourages or discourages you from enjoying a quiet moment?

Pull up a chair. Click to comment.  This is a quiet space for you & me.

~~~~~

The Journey: A Whitespace Story From You {Alyssa}

alyssa_whitespaceAlyssa Zech just started taking the journey to find rest.

Since reading Finding Spiritual Whitespace, Alyssa has shared some intimate glimpses into her whitespace moments with us in the Whitespace Thursday Linkup. She is also participating in the Finding Spiritual Whitespace Blog Tour.

Today I’d like to share excerpts from Alyssa’s blog Sunrise Avenue.  They tell the beautiful story of rest taking shape in her.

I just finished reading “Finding Spiritual Whitespace” by Bonnie Gray. For a long time my life just was. I didn’t realize how bad it was. Who realizes what they are living isn’t normal if they have never experienced ‘normal’?

And my life wasn’t, and isn’t, bad per se. My family are all alive and healthy, I’m married with a healthy, exuberant toddler. My hubby’s job is stable and comfortable. I am not busy, quite the opposite.

But I still had hurts, cuts that run deep.

I didn’t realize how perfect I had become at avoiding.

When feelings ran high, I’d turn to earthly things, TV, Facebook, books, and just avoid feeling anything. By the time my Doctor Who episode was over I wouldn’t feel the same. I had emptied all feelings and filled up on imaginary characters.

I would call it rest. Yet…I never felt rested.

I felt stressed, exhausted, and not enough.

And I thought it was just me, I just thought this was normal, that this was life. Happy was just a fluffy cookie, quickly and briefly experienced.

Bonnie Gray cut my heart to the quick… I’m learning…Rest is found in a deep breath, in closed eyes and a quick prayer: “God, I’m here. Thank you. Fill me.”

I can be. I can relax. I can love and be loved here. Now. Whereever. Whenever.

I am finding my Spiritual Whitespace.

One week later, a beautiful thing happened. As Alyssa valued her own soul rest, she felt moved to help create whitespace for someone she loves. 

Here is how Alyssa’s new story of rest is shaping another person’s story…

Last week I wrote about how I am trying to find my own spiritual whitespace. This new book and community are changing my views of rest and God so much. I feel the opportunities to grow and learn and endless these days!!

Just like Bonnie Gray suggested, I planned out for myself specific times to rest. I took a walk out by a lake and really looked at the trees and grass around me, instead of just focusing on the pavement. I lit a candle and read my book while savoring a cup of coffee.

But I also realized that on this Journey to Rest…I am not the only one who needs the time and space to discover this.

 I realized that my Hubby, who works so hard to provide for his family, needs rest just as much as me. I overlook this sometimes because he is an extrovert that loves his family so much.

alyssazech_whitespace…I set up our kitchen table as a warm, inviting place for him to eat breakfast, relax, and spend some time completely to himself. I lit a candle, brewed some coffee, and even tidied the living room a bit so the clutter wouldn’t distract him…

Finding and experiencing rest will be an always transforming, fluid journey I think. There are so many ways to discover Jesus in our small little worlds, that just this small step of branching out and discovering Jesus in the world of another person….blew my mind. It brought me such JOY. 

I am wrapped up in me.

But that is okay. Why? Because just by knowing this, admitting this, Jesus is slowly unraveling me.

JESUS will be my source of rest and strength, and through Him…all things are possible.

Wanna Support Me Tomorrow?  My Book Is Finally Launching Tuesday 6/3/14

"Finding Spiritual Whitespace: Awakening Your Soul To Rest" by Bonnie Gray

My voice is small, but with your voices joining mine, echoes of God’s grace will invite others to take this book into to their hearts and hands!

Support me by clicking on this Thunderclap link. It automatically sends out tweets & Facebook posts about the book release from you to your friends to help share the news.

It’s super easy & quick.  Just click. No need to sign up or register anything. Thank you so much for your kind & generous support!
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3 Ways To Participate in 21 Days of Rest

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Join a community of fellow kindreds who are already taking the journey to explore and find rest. A little over 100 bloggers have graciously signed up to read the book and take the journey to rest.

Here are 3 ways you can participate in the 21 Days of Rest Challenge:

1)   Share your whitespace/restful moments. Use hashtag #SpiritualWhitespace on Instagram & Twitter.

2)   Try any of the Whitespace Challenges. Tell us how it went by blogging & linking up your post in our Whitespace Thursday Linkup .

(publish your post on ANY day that works for you.  Just linkup on Thursday.)

3)  Read the Finding Spiritual Whitespace & share your discoveries. Write a blog post about your experience and upload your link on this Whitespace Book Reader Page here.  I’d love to hear how you enjoyed the read.

(*After you upload your book review: email the link of your book review blog post to faithbarista@gmail.com to join a private Whitespace Facebook Group – a community of kindreds encouraging each other on the journey of rest. note: I’m brewing lots of writing, so it will take awhile for me to send you the FB group invite. Thanks for your understanding.)

~~~~~

 

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21 Days of Rest: Finding Spiritual Whitespace

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12 Comments

  • Reply Joan June 2, 2014 at 4:58 am

    A favorite verse of mine is (paraphrased)…In quietness and rest shall be your strength, but you would not. (Isa. 30:15 NLT This is what the Sovereign LORD, the Holy One of Israel, says: “Only in returning to me and resting in me will you be saved. In quietness and confidence is your strength. But you would have none of it.)
    I love this verse because it reminds me of what I most desperately need…to simple come to God and be still and “know” that He is with me.
    When life is too big, or memories arise afresh ALL that is NEEDED is to simply “return and rest”.
    WHY IS THAT SO HARD?
    For me it is because the emotions arise and swell up…gently because Abba is always gentle with me, but a big foreign still to “feel”.
    Today, I hope to drive to the beach for an hour in late afternoon.
    But at many points during the day, I will stop to simply be who I am with Abba. Otherwise I could not make it through the day.
    As a side note. A few weeks ago I found a dreaded lump and was sent for a diagnostic Mammogram and ultra sound. It turned out to be totally benign, praise and thank you God, but my main prayer was for PEACE for Shalom. God granted that desire during the week of waiting for the appointment. When I went to the place, He upheld me. One way was they had this soothing music playing on a TV and the pictures were of God’s creation.

  • Reply Joan June 2, 2014 at 5:02 am

    “to simple come to God and be still and “know” that He is with me….should say *simply* come.

  • Reply Dawn Paoletta (@breathoffaith) June 2, 2014 at 8:12 am

    I have chills for you, Bonnie and love Alyssa’s thoughts…

    Oh, the timing of it all, is incomprehensible. Tuning in and seeking rest…even as the waves rock my boat!

  • Reply nannette June 2, 2014 at 9:19 am

    I’m so longing for rest! My husband and I recently took our first “semi-private (just the two of us) Yoga class. It was an hour long! At first, I couldn’t even begin to relax my body. Slowly, my body cooperated, but my mind was another thing. I wake up most nights with a long “to do” list and struggle to go back to sleep. I began to realize just how up tight I am, both physically and mentally. I grit/grind my teeth both day and night. How did I get to this place?

  • Reply Day 2: 21 Days of Rest | Fuller Way of Life June 2, 2014 at 9:44 am

    […] find Bonnie’s Day 2 blog post here. “The truth is this: who you are–your heart–is more important to God than any […]

  • Reply Linda Schaeffer June 2, 2014 at 10:08 am

    I would like to quote Martha Beck, who Oprah calls the smartest woman she knows…”Rest until you feel like playing and then play until you feel like resting.” She writes A Resting Revolution if you want to know more! Love the opportunity to have a 21 day devotional. Thank you Bonnie!

  • Reply Lisa June 2, 2014 at 3:10 pm

    I’m just saying thank you to God and resting now. I am still enjoying your new book, Bonnie, and am encouraged by how Alyssa responded to the call to rest too. Blessings on the launch. May you be resting between His shoulders and soaring spiritually tomorrow!

    But those who trust in the LORD will find new strength. They will soar high on wings like eagles. They will run and not grow weary. They will walk and not faint. ~ Isaiah 40:31
    (NLT)

    About Benjamin he said: “Let the beloved of the LORD rest secure in him, for he shields him all day long, and the one the LORD loves rests between his shoulders.” ~ Deuteronomy 33:12

  • Reply rebecca June 2, 2014 at 4:49 pm

    I love to get my coffee and take it, with my journal, on the back deck in the morning.

  • Reply Kristin Waters June 3, 2014 at 5:20 am

    Bonnie, I think you have summed it up best :

    It’s easier to be functional rather than soft and tender.
    Quiet makes us vulnerable.
    Quiet connects us to our heart. The truth of how things really are.

    Sometimes I feel it’s easier to keep moving instead of looking inward….am I the person I thought I would grow up to be? Am I worthy of anyone else’s attention. let alone my own or God’s?….I think those thoughts keep me from being still…. I also haven’t been diligent about writing – and I think writing helps free my soul and helps heal the inner parts of me. When I don’t write, the panic festers and bubbles up….until I write again….

  • Reply Kay June 3, 2014 at 7:05 am

    When I wake up I think of Jesus waiting for me to spend time with Him. During the winter, He’s waiting in a chair near the fireplace. In summer, He’s waiting in the garden in the sunshine. Always it is first thing in the morning. If I don’t meet with Him first thing in the morning, it is too easy to ignore His voice the rest of the day. The more this has become the start of my day, the more comfortable I am with listening to God. Unlike the rest of the world there is no condemnation from Him. There is peace in the quiet.

  • Reply Darlene June 3, 2014 at 2:34 pm

    I appreciate the verse at the top. 1st Thess 4:10 and 11. It’s very good!! To excel still more and to make it my ambition to lead a quiet. (my words)
    If my life is quiet enough, than I can excel!! Thank you Bonnie.

  • Reply Laura June 8, 2014 at 3:16 am

    Thank you, Bonnie, for reminding us that it is okay to rest. We don’t have to prove anything – just to be still before The Lord and hear His quiet whispers for our soul to connect with His – is the best gift we can give God, ourselves and our loved ones. We come out better on the other side.

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