So, I just came back from a week of being unplugged-off-the-grid on vacation in San Diego last week.

I was unpacking (a week is a long time with two boys and a hubby) and I couldn’t wait to confide in you about it all.

I discovered something very surprising.  

Something I didn’t suspect at all.

And I didn’t even know it was happening.  In just one month.

Right under my nose… my fingertips.

I was addicted to social media.  

After all, I’ve been disengaged online a lot for two years during my journey through PTSD, leading up to the book launch last month.

Maybe… All of Me

Since June, I’ve been taking big social media steps to walk the little girl in me out into the world — to release my book Finding Spiritual Whitespace — to share news of the book’s birth.

Social media makes sense this way, because well, it’s pretty awesome that we can use technology to come alongside each other on our journey of faith — to encourage each other and be kindreds.

But, as Eric and I were packing the night before our road trip, Hubby asked me, “So, just so I can set my expectations.  And it’s okay if you want to keep being online.  ‘Cuz I know you’re in book launch mode.  But, I just need to know… “

Eric paused, so I’d stop counting the number of socks the boys needed on the trip and look up at him. “I just need to know how much you’re going to be working on your computer.  How much are you going to be doing this on vacation?”

Eric was pantomiming me swiping my fingers on my iphone, turning me into a caricature of Gollum loving on his precious.

I assured him being online was the last thing I wanted to do. I rolled my eyes back in protest with a ha-ha-very-funny expression.

“Honey. I’ve just been online a lot for the book launch.  I’m dying for this vacation. No work. Total whitespace.”

“Okay…”  Eric looked at me funny, like he was going to burp. He didn’t believe me.

It made me all the more adamant to prove to him I was going to do it.  To be honest, I was gonna check my phone a little bit. 

But, I realized behind the cute jabs from Eric laid an honest concern.  And a very honest desire.  Maybe my husband really wanted all of me.  And maybe my kids did too.  And maybe God too?

Maybe as understanding as my husband and kids have been that mommy’s book is finally out, they would love to just be with me.  With no intrusion or reflection of anyone or anything else.

My soul immediately knew it was true.  Because that was what I myself really longed for — Total whitespace.  

Deep inside, all of me wanted it too —  Soul rest.

Maybe… Tethered

I enjoy whitespace for a day pretty regularly, but a whole week — in the middle of my book release?

I was afraid to unplug completely right in the middle of everything.

Maybe people would think I’m being lazy or irresponsible.

Maybe I might miss out on some opportunity.

Or maybe something would happen and I’d miss it.

Or maybe someone would comment or post an update.

And because I could not email, favorite, tweet, like or comment, someone would think I didn’t care.

These are the strands of fear that tethered me to online.

Face like Flint

It was really, really hard the first 24 hours to be off-the-grid.

I had to take my Mail/FB/Twitter/Instagram apps off my iPhone so there was no temptation to click!  

But, I could feel the phantom promptings to tap my phone and check for messages.

So, you see, even after two years of being disengaged online during PTSD, after a month of being online, it still takes face-like-flint determination to get a week of  #spiritualwhitespace.

But, it was so soul refreshing!

I got inspired about things I’d put to the side during the book launch. I was fully present with myself, my kids and my husband.  

We roamed in bookstores and picked out books.  We played cards and talked about the most random, non-sensical things.

We listened to the ocean breathe and saw diamonds glitter in the sand between our toes.  

We found forgotten ways to waste time together.  Just because we could.

Now that I’m back, there is still work to do in being faithful to the business side of publishing a book, but my soul feels rested and rejuvenated.  I’m filled with new curiosities and ideas.

My soul is filled to the brim with whitespace, my heart full of beautiful memories and rest.

So I’m serving up a #spiritualwhitespace challenge for you:  

Dare to unplug completely. Go Off the Grid.
Even if it’s for a day.
(updated 7/10/14: Or start with a cyber-free morning/afternoon)

It’s going to hurt for the first 24 hours.  But, it is so worth it.

So, here’s the challenge:

Take a Whitespace Vacation:
Unplug and Go Off the Grid. 

Psst… let us know how it goes.
Share on any Thursday Linkup or comment.
It helps to have kindreds to confide in. 

What:  No laptop, email, no social media, text-free. Practice Cyber Stillness.
  

When:  On a vacation/staycation you’ve already planned

– OR –   Pick one day (any day)

– OR  –   Start with a Cyber-Free morning/afternoon
(updated 7/10/14 based on reader feedback:
a whole day may be too hard to begin with. babysteps, babysteps…)

How:  Here are 5 Ways to Unplug and Go Off the Grid:

[#1]  Set up an email and phone voicemail vacation message.

Google for directions for your mail service and you’ll see you’re not alone on this task.

How this helps you:

* Frees you from obligation/expectations to read your email or listen to your voicemail.
Friends don’t expect you to read or respond.

* Frees your mind from mentally having to keep track of who needs what.

* Here is the email vacation message I used.  Customize it for you:

Hi there,

Rest is like chocolate for the soul as much as whitespace breathes beauty for art.

I’m unplugging on a Whitespace Vacation until –/–/–. I’m currently offline and so sorry to miss you! 

Take care and be sure to make room to savor some rest and whitespace for your soul.  

Feel the sun on a walk. Catch some ocean spray in your hair.  Or just curl up with a good book with a cup of coffee and some quiet next to a light summer breeze.

Kindreds,
Bonnie

[#2]  Move your social media apps off your phone.

On my iphone, I hold my finger on the screen and it will allow me to drag and drop applications to another location.  I moved all my mail and social media apps off of my first, main screen and “hid” them away on the last screen.  I set boundaries for myself: no swiping to the last panel.

How this helps you:

* Seeing the apps will trigger you to automatically tap.  These apps were made to show you updates, so you’ll respond.
Removing them will stop your automatic response.

[#3]  Turn on Do Not Disturb Feature on your smart phone.

In iPhone settings, you can turn on the “Do Not Disturb” feature.  It will silence all alerts and phone calls (one exception: you can specify any contact (like your spouse) to be a “Favorite” and it will allow calls/texts from Favorites).

How this helps you:

* Detox from having to always look or pick up your phone.  Your soul will breathe with hands-free whitespace.

 * The phone will not ring or buzz you and you’ll experience stillness. Quiet. Engage all your senses to enjoy the moment.

[#4]  Turn off social media email/text notifications. 

By default, I opt-out of email/text notifications for social media apps.  To eliminate as much stress/anxiety triggers and to create whitespace, I avoid multi-tasking.  I choose single-tasking as much as possible.

So, I consciously participate in social media by using the apps rather than have it interrupt me with notifications. 

Everyone has a different rhythm and sensitivity — and threshold for multi-tasking — so please give yourself permission to do what works for you. There is not right or wrong.  So, if you do have social media notifcations setup, you’ll want to turn them off as step #4.

[#5]  Simply, directly, let others know you are unplugging with whitespace and work will not be done during whitespace.

This is hard. It is easier to say yes because our always busy-hyper-achievement oriented culture does not give us permission to say “no” or “I won’t be able to do that this time” unless we’re sick or something is wrong.  

We are  good at worrying about what will happen to others if we don’t do something for them.  But, it helps to remember Jesus said that Mary choose the “better” choice, enjoying resting with Him.  Give yourself permission to say yes to your well-being, even if it’s awkward. Even if the Marthas may not be pleased with us.

~~~~~

What do you think of this unplugging-off-the-grid whitespace challenge?

Pull up a chair. Click to comment. Your voice helps me find mine.

~~~~~ 

Today’s post is part of my special Book Launch Tour Series  {21 Days of Rest: FindingSpiritual Whitespace}.  Click here to read Day 1 and the entire series on rest.

Now It’s Your Turn!

Whitespace Thursdays Link Up

Blog about your whitespace moments. 

Publish your post ANY DAY of the week.  

Link up on Thursday.  Visit & comment on the post before yours.

Use the Whitespace Thursday Linkup Badge.

Write what prompts your heart. Share your voice.

Today’s Thursday 7/10/14 Writing Prompt:  Take time to enjoy doing something creative or artistic. Share what you did, how it felt and what you discovered.

Next Thursday 7/17/14 Writing Prompt:  Share a whitespace moment this week. 

Other writing prompts:

* If you’re reading the book, share your discoveries. How is the book speaking to you?

*  Share your whitespace moments.

– moments of beauty and rest
– feeding your soul
– your alone time with God

* Choose your own open writing prompt.  Be you.

Thank you for using #spiritualwhitespace to share your pictures on Instagram & Twitter!
It’s fun to see the moments that feed your soul this week!

{email subscribers, click here to link up your post in the Whitespace Linkup.}

Take The Journey of Rest With Me

Take the Finding Spiritual Whitespace journey to make space to rest, despite whatever chaos and stress clutters our everyday lives.

Take the journey of self-discovery with Jesus with journal prompts for individual or intimate group exploration. Let’s live a better story of rest. Together.

Purchase a copy of my memoir-driven guidebook for yourself and your friends.  Because rest isn’t a journey we need to take alone.  We need each other.

Because some stories can’t be told on a blog.  They are so intimate, they can only echo in the sacred space of the printed page. Letters from my heart bound together for you.

Let’s be kindreds. Let’s meet between the pages of Finding Spiritual Whitespace.